Why did the chicken cross the road?
VICE PRESIDENT GORE
I fight for the chickens and I am fighting for the chickens right
now. I will not give up on the
chickens crossing the road! I will fight for the chickens and I will
not disappoint them.
GOVERNOR GEORGE W. BUSH
I don't believe we need to get the chickens across the road. I say give the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs to let go of strangling the chickens so they can get across the road.
SENATOR LIEBERMAN
I believe that every chicken has the right to worship his or her God
in his or her own way.
Crossing the road is a spiritual journey and no chicken should be denied
the right to cross the road
in his or her own way.
SECRETARY CHENEY
Chickens are big-time because they have wings. They could fly if they
wanted to. Chickens don't
want to cross the road. They don't need help crossing the road. In fact,
I'm not interested in
crossing the road myself.
RALPH NADER
Chickens are misled into believing there is a road by the evil tire
makers. Chickens aren't ignorant,
but our society pays tire makers to create the need for these roads and
then lures chickens into
believing there is an advantage to crossing them. Down with the roads,
up with chickens.
PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.
JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see
the plain truth in front of
your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what
"they" call it-the "other side."
Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you
will become gay too. I say
we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the
liberal media whitewashes with
seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should
not be free to cross the
road. It's as plain and simple as that.
DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes! The chicken crossed the road,
but why it crossed, I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross without having their motives called into question.
GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone
told us that the chicken
crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX
It was a historical inevitability.
SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified
in dropping 50 tons of nerve
gas on it.
RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?
CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens
have to cross before
you believe it?
FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your
important documents, and balance your checkbook -and Internet
Explorer is an inextricable part
of eChicken.
EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by
"chicken"? Could you define
"chicken" please?
GEORGE BUSH
I don't think I should have to answer that question.
THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken,
"Thou shalt cross the
road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?